Faith, Personal Growth

Day 7: Getting Stuck in Living Small

table rock camping
Our tent at Table Rock State Park, NC in 2010

This is where I get stuck.  I get stuck in being messed up.  I pitch my tent IN MY MESS and use it as a filter from which I see myself and interact with everyone. If we stay stuck, we miss the truth of who we really are.

To live small, we made the brave and bold confession together yesterday that:

messed-up chick

But today, let’s agree that we need not stay there! We need NOT exist with the “stupid-me” mentality. It’s a deceptive, destructive way of thinking:

My kids are tyrants because I’m a horrible mom. Stupid me.

Oooo. Why did I just say that? I bet she thinks I’m so selfish. Stupid me.

I just ate those 6 double-stuffed oreos! Ugh. Stupid me.

My husband must think I’m aging and flabby since I haven’t gone to the gym for months now. Stupid me.

I  didn’t volunteer for that needed spot at school. Now the PTO must think I’m a loser parent. Stupid me.

I didn’t clean the bathroom again today. Stupid me.

These thinkings reinforce our smallness. We remain stuck in THE SMALL and totally miss THE TRUTH of who we really are. Look at the rest of what Paul says in this verse:

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment {to put a moderate estimate upon one’s self, use self control}, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you. Romans 12:3 NIV

Have a true estimation of who you really are.

Don’t get stuck in your own mess. Move on from “stupid-me” mentality by grabbing hold of God’s grace that reaches into your mess and loves you still… by grabbing hold of His strength that holds you when you can’t stand yourself.

Grab hold and move on.

Lift that pretty head. Look people in the eye. Allow a smile to curve your lips heavenward. All because YOU ARE LOVED. In knowing everything messy about you, God loves you still and His promises still remain.

You are loved. You are cared for. You are carried. You are protected. You are guided. Out of His grace. Grab hold of that in faith and you will begin to see that living small, living with the appropriate and correct opinion of yourself, breaks down the walls of assumptions, breaks through the walls of trying so hard, obliterates the self-effort and self-loathing and fear of failure. You can begin to believe it right down to your bones- in spite of your mess.

His grace is where it begins.

Revamp the “stupid-me” mentality (from above) with some self-evaluation and simple steps of grace-filled obedience:

My kids are tyrants...

Kids are kids and maybe I’ve been a bit lazy. What things do I need to do to develop a better parenting plan? (One of my FAVORITE parenting books is Boundaries with Kids by Cloud and Townshend.)

Oooo. Why did I just say that?

I’ve got to let it go. Lord, I did say it out of a place for approval or pleasing? Help me to resolve my worth in you.

I just ate those 6 double-stuffed oreos! Ugh. 

Oreos were my answers to a hard day. May I redo what comfort looks like. Chocolate goodness may not be the best answer. 

My husband must think I’m aging and flabby since I haven’t gone to the gym for months now.

It’s really an issue of me feeling bad about myself. Tomorrrow I’m going to the gym and at least getting started. 

I  didn’t volunteer for that needed spot at school.

I am the master of my schedule. I cannot do everything or be everything to everyone. My worth isn’t in the busyness of my schedule.

I didn’t clean the bathroom again today.

I need to release myself from that standard. I’ll hit the bathrooms first thing tomorrow. And as I’m scrubbing the messy toilet, I’ll have a heart of gratitude that I have a toilet to clean and messy people to clean up after!

By living small, by accepting my mess and moving on in His truth-filled grace, we can enter into the doorway of all that humility offers.

Let’s not get stuck in our smallness. Grab my hand and move on with me into the big things God has for us!

31 days, the nester, live small

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2 thoughts on “Day 7: Getting Stuck in Living Small

  1. Grace is about more than just God toward us. Grace is about us toward others and us toward ourselves.

    I was part of a healing group last night that talked about contempt, both other-centered contempt and self-contempt. It’s amazing the contempt that can dominate our thoughts, both toward others and toward ourselves.

    God doesn’t expect us to be perfect. He wants us to love and trust him. What a relief!

    Thank you for your good post.

    1. Amen! Grace oh sweet grace. We can only give it to others when we have first received it for ourselves. Goodness. Contempt is such a weighted word. May healing continue and freedom break through in your group.

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