There is a lot I can accomplish by sheer grit.
I can scramble eggs at 5:45 am. I can stay up late-late to help with a school project. I can play one more game of Candyland or one more Lego battle. I can clean gross bathrooms and do load and loads of laundry.
No matter how hard I try, I can never truly have the inner, sparkly, lasting beauty that His light offers.
But, I may be able to fool you. I can fake it. I can project a shiny smile and showcase some good deeds. I can broadcast the dazzling Christian-y lingo and never really surrender. I can still rely on myself and my own efforts yet walk in the dark. If I do any of it without Jesus, it’s an empty and counterfeit shine. Totally and absolutely fake.
Can you relate? It seems I can move in and out of His shine because I move from trusting in Him TO relying on myself. In and out of trust. In and out of His shine.
But now, all you who light fires
and provide yourselves with flaming torches,
go, walk in the light of your fires
and of the torches you have set ablaze.
This is what you shall receive from my hand:
You will lie down in torment. Isaiah 50:11, NIV
Ouch! We aren’t the only generation who has tried to do it on their own. But, God gives a sweet way out:
Let the one who walks in the dark,
who has no light,
trust in the name of the Lord
and rely on their God. Isaiah 50:10, NIV
How do you move/position back into His light? Trust and rely on God. If you have no light and are tired of the measly light you can provide on your own, trust and rely on God.
Trust He is who He says He is.
Trust He knows what’s best for you.
Trust the He is actively working in your life.
So, if you are tired of faking it, talk to Him. Invite Him into your doubt and self-effort. Ask Him to strengthen you and show you how.
And then, my friend, you will be warmed again by the light of His presence- the authentic, bubbly, can’t-help-but-shine light- from the inside out!
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